25 January 2013

A Great Cull is A-Comin'

Started working on an epic poem about the upcoming Great Cull.  It's not really ready yet but time is short, no one knows when the appointed hour may strike, so just in case, I'm putting up this draft, I can always edit it later as circumstances evolve. It's probably a banjo tune but also works as a rock-beating chant in case banjo technology is lost in The Upheaval.

The Great Cull is a-coming
So bow down in its path
A harsh wind is a-humming
Enjoy it while it lasts

All sheep come out for culling
For eight of ten of ye
Give or take
Shall be terminated for the general good of the rest

Means mass death for most folk
But I think that's OK
Either way it's coming
So lay down in its way

The mighty scythe of Depopulus
Lord of culling and pruning
Shall swing his mighty shears
And lay waste to approximately 80% of us
As indicated above

The Great Cull is bearing down
Too many reasons to list 'em
Mindless overconsumption
Pillaged ecosystems

Thursday nights
No longer Must-see
But Must-survive

The Great Cull now approacheth
Please hum a happy tune
There’s not much anyone can do
From here it's hittin soon

We can’t stop the trends
And all this over-breeding
Means a Great Cull is a-coming
Humanity receding

Here come de Great Cull, chillun
Sing a happy song
For the Great Cull is a-coming
From now it won’t be long

(All together now, the big finale:)
The Great Cull is a-coming
Let ye have no doubt
When the Great Cull hits the Great Big Fan
It will be interesting to see how things play out

By the way, if any band – specifically a band of musicians, no roving bands of thugs, or bandicoots – wishes to license these lyrics, and/or a Hollywood producer wants it on the soundtrack for his next big picture, have your people call my people, etc.

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